and i’ve never known this thought before or entertained it in my mind that even though it seems you are- perhaps you’re not just being kind. perhaps the gentle smiles you give are signs of what you feel and maybe your outspoken laugh means that this is real.
all along i knew i was only fooling myself, and here i am again, coming face to face with the reality. i knew you couldn’t feel for me; i knew that much was true. but now that i’ve heard you say the words i don’t know what to do.
it rained again last night- surrounding us all with a humid cloud. the fog of summers spring brought the thawing thoughts into my mind. it’s strange to see you on the horizon; a distant, shimmering mirage. are you simply a trick of the eye? i always second guess, check my watch, and when i squint […]
i’m thinking maybe in five years from now, we’ll have it figured out, expecting i learn to follow my own directions. they always said they’d lead exactly to where i wanted to be, but i was too blind to pay attention. and then there you were, hiding the sunrise in your smile, and leaving me […]
something different, something new; i’m seeing sun in different hues but none of them is as bright as you, though you’re not on my mind. wait- i guess that is a lie; because i am thinking of you. but not the way i usually do- no, this time it’s something new.
[recording on soundcloud] the sun was shining on that day- when you first called my name. i could say anything and you’d stay and stay and stay. i wasn’t afraid of losing you at all, but it’s always what we love the most that falls. [is it true? is it true? did you really leave […]
yesterday gave me tremors; prickles down my spine. and gradually i realized that the cause of it was you. i didn’t want to admit it at the time, but gradually i realized my worst fear was coming true.
don’t you see? just how much you mean to me can’t you tell? just how hard it was i fell and for who? nobody else but you
the noise is deafening sometimes and i can’t find my way outside this box that i’ve been shoved into; while loving you and loving you
[rough recording on soundcloud] i walked with you when it looked like rain, stood by your side when nobody else would look your way; but what does it mean to you? oh, it don’t mean a thing. gave you all i had, though it wasn’t much. you promised me that it would be enough. you […]