clean slate

clean slate

words dissapate

fears evaporate

off the smoothed edge



the place where i was is still where i am, but i am someone new (or at least i want to believe i am).

some days i heart the whispers of you on the breeze past my ears but i don’t listen. other days you’re like a soothing background buzz

and i lean in to the familiar hum of your presence.

most days, however, i don’t feel you at all-

i haven’t decided yet if that’s good or bad. after so many years of you holding my happiness in your hands, it feels a little cold without their grasp around me.

now you’re gone, but i’m still here

and i’d like to say i’ve moved on.


how long had it been? too long, my mind decided

but too recent to forget the way the moments slid around me

like rain off an umbrella.

there’s something unforgettable about going through the motions;

things that used to bring the light only cast a shadow of indifference.

and i didn’t like it. but there was nothing i could change.

my socks were soggy with the moments that my brain had missed-

but they collected in my shoes

making each step forward feel like the first upon a mountain.

Ache (unfinished)

stop giving me ideas of love that won’t come true. it really hurts to know it’s never going to happen, and it hurts even more that i still hope it will.

you make me ache with smiles and fleeting glances. you make me sore with wanting for things i have no chance with. you need to stop right now, you need to stop right there, cause you are just too cute to bear.